There Are No Secrets

oh-noooooI am learning the hard way that there are no secrets when you have a three year old running around the house.  Now, I’ll preface this with two things.  1. This post is going to be of a somewhat personal nature.  If you’re not comfortable thinking of us this way, stop reading now.  I’ll wait………and 2. Our family is very open with Brighton about bodies.  One thing I never want for Brighton is for him to be ashamed of his body like I always was when I was young.  And given that Brighton was breast fed until he was 18 months old, so pretty much nothing is off limits for me.

OK so here goes.  Remember, personal nature.  So I get a message on my phone this afternoon on the way to the grocery store after work.  It’s from Brighton’s “pre school” teacher (I use quotes because it’s a home pre school so things are very much more laid back) telling me that she has a funny story to tell me about what Brighton thinks of my chest…giggle giggle.  And so I hold off on calling Mary back to find out just what Brighton told everyone about my chest, as the scenarios run through my mind like a bad home made movie.   “Oh God, does he remember that awful Ameda electric breast pump and when I would sit with it hooked up like a milk cow?”  “Oh gosh, lastnight he was patting my right boob like a baby’s bottom…did he tell them that?”  What could it be?

While I’m lost in my grocery shopping, I forget all about “the boob” incidents flooding my mind.  I happily walk into Mary’s Playhouse and Mary cheerily announces to me that Brighton told the following story to his preschool class on the way home from the Children’s Museum today.  I’ll try to recant this story to the best of my ability.  Not having been there, of course, it is not verbatum.  But you will get the idea:

Ellie: “My brother runs around the house naked!  I can’t wait ’till I’m older and I can do that!”  (Ellie is 3 also)

Brighton: “When my mom jumps up and down her boobies go up”

…………………………………….

awkward silence.  Mary can barely unbuckle one of the other kids from his carseat for laughing hysterically…

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

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